Who am I? My Journey From Naive to Medical Marijuana Cardholder

Who am I? All you have to do is reach down and grab a handful of sand, make sure you catch clean sand. Now, allow that sand to fall from your grasp to let the grains scatter. That is what we all are, just tiny grains of sand in the Cosmo of the world.

The election makes that knowledge even more prominent. As the small grains in a large pile of sand, no one person seems to make a difference. As just one little grain falls, one direction others will follow. So as you look at the elections remember as a lone piece of sand, we are inconsequential, but like a sand castle, we are strong.

I have gotten so frustrated with the elections and all the lies the candidates want to spread. It is sadly a case of mudslinging every time politicians run for office. However this seems to outshine all eternity with their levels of nasty.

So moving past he said, she said of the candidates I move my focus to some of the issues. And once again I am disgusted with the ignorance of so many individuals who are working to sway voters their direction. Still, they have no clue to the truth.

I am a former medical marijuana patient. The only reason I am not a card holder at the moment is that I am trying to help spread information to the rest of the world.

I did not grow up believing that marijuana had a purpose, I thought it was purely the 'devil's weed.' I assumed anyone who smoked it was going to hell. After all, it was illegal, how could it be okay?

Then, my life changed. My eyes opened. I had reached a challenging point in life. My Daddy had died just a short time after Mama. My identity stolen, our house burnt, and my family disowned me. It was a bleak time for me to say the least.

My psychiatrist had me on so many pharmaceutical drugs I didn't even really know who I was. And I didn't participate in life. It was a black spot in my life.

My mind was foggy, and it just kept getting worse. That caused my doctor to add more and more pharmaceuticals to the list that I took. My Doctor worked to convince me that every pill she added would be the one that made me feel better. She was wrong.

That was when my journey to enlightenment began. After much protest, I succumbed to Lynn flushing my meds, and I was convinced to smoke a joint.

How could this be right, I didn't feel worse I felt better. But my mind was fighting the concept. Marijuana could not be making me feel more human, or could it? Everything in my life and my world told me this was not possible.

That was the just the edge of the knowledge I would acquire over the next couple of years. We picked up and moved to California. It was as if we had transported to an entirely new planet.

Everyone had such a different view on marijuana. No one considered it evil; it was just a plant. Some people used it, grew it, and others didn't. The general public didn't place as much emphasis on it as you might think.

I continued to fight medical marijuana in my life. When you have felt one way for so long, it's hard to just throw that to the side. But I began to look at what it was doing for everyone around me.

We lived in a couple of neighborhoods where most everyone was growing weed. Not where I pictured myself living. It was not what the world thinks when they imagine pot growers. This group of individuals was just a bunch of ordinary people. There was a nurse, construction worker, retired engineer, old hippie lady, parents, grandparents, and just people.

It was not a commune. It was not a drug infested world of laziness. It was hard working people just trying to make their way through this life. There were those dealing with chronic pain, cancer, traumas, all sorts of diseases, and even just average daily stress.

The media tries to push the thoughts that modern medical marijuana would only cater to the hangnail generation. Those people who cry wolf about anything that would get them medical weed.

But the real truth is different. We have to realize that the statistics of individuals who are falsely getting hardcore pharmaceuticals is staggering. That is a REAL problem.

Medical marijuana was not causing even a fraction of the problems that pharmaceuticals were causing. So my world in California was leaning toward the real truth, marijuana was useful.

Finally, I was convinced enough to see a doctor about using medical marijuana. I thought like most people it was just a manner of saying I want to weed and bam you got a card. But, I was so wrong.

The doctor was so knowledgeable and helpful He knew that marijuana had to potential to help not only my bipolar disorder, but it was perfect for my chronic pain and fibromyalgia. So I joined the ranks of medical marijuana card holders.

It was weird. My Doctor helped me to learn the I should stay away from Sativa because it made me manic and he helped me to know that for me Indica could let me join life.

How strange it was to consume marijuana and all of a sudden I was feeling healthy. Or as normal as possible. I wasn't high, I wasn't out of it, and I felt good.


I never got to the point where I liked smoking, so my world became part of the edibles.

So much has been said about the harm of medical marijuana and especially how dangerous edibles can be. Those thoughts come out of the ignorance and lack of knowledge.

To the states that have marijuana legislation on the ballot, I hope the voters will all take the time to listen to people who have been there. Patients, parents, caregivers, and growers. Marijuana does not increase the crime rate of places that include it within their list of medications.

It is a different world that everyone thinks. Growers of marijuana are not drug kingpins; they are patients or caregivers who just want to make life better. The money made from growing marijuana is not purchasing planes or private islands. The money that a grower might make from his crop goes to the local farm store, Walmart, grocery stores, electric companies, and the local gas station.

The reality is that medical marijuana growers are just small farmers trying to get by in this crazy world. They are just people.

Dispensaries are not drug cartel locations where drug dealers and addicts are congregating to buy drugs. They are pharmacies where people of all ages get a medication that helps them deal with whatever ailment they are facing.

The states that have had medical marijuana for years are mesmerized by the rest of the population's misconception on weed.

Arkansas has two issues on the ballot. One is the Arkansas Medical Cannabis Act that will allow patients and caregivers to grow their own and covers more medical issues. Read the full bill at https://ballotpedia.org. The second is an amendment that limits the medical problems and growing.

Both are pro-medical marijuana while the Act would help more people.

I have listened to the news media tell how this will cause crime to rise and take away from the budget. While having medical marijuana legal does not mean crime will increase. Instead, it means people are getting the help they need. Look at the locations where medical marijuana is legal, and their crime rates have even been seen to drop.

Okay, I will admit that with all things there are always bad apples. But the medical marijuana community is a laid back group. Only those who know nothing about the issue are the ones crying wolf.

How can they honestly want to limit the number of illnesses or problems that marijuana could help? No one is screaming that viagra should only help individual cases of erectile dysfunction. Even though everyone has heard of the countless times this drug misused.

Sure one is most definitely not like another, but you get my point.  And when this same media talks about how horrible it is for someone to get medical marijuana if they don't need it, to this I say okay but is it a bad thing? How many people use alcohol to help deal with issues in their life? How many are taking prescriptions when they don't need them?
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Things in life are abused but is that reason enough to keep a child from having life-saving medication to help them live a better life? Should someone be limited from using a natural medication to help ease their pain?

I was one of the masses who thought this way until I learned to open my eyes.

I have lived in a medical marijuana world, and I survived. The one thing I found out above all else was that when it came to marijuana, I was not as smart as I thought.

Learn the truth. Marijuana is just a word, Cannabis is the, and it is a natural plant. One plant that has existed since the beginning of time, a completely all natural by-product of mother nature.

Would you want to keep someone who is suffering from taking medical marijuana just because you think it is bad?

Arkansas will vote in November as will Florida, Montana, and North Dakota on medical marijuana. California, Nevada, Arizona, Maine, and Massachusetts will vote for full legalization of recreational.

The kicker is that everyone knows Colorado has legal recreational marijuana, but did you remember that Alaska, Oregon, and may I have a drumroll please, WASHINGTON DC. Let that sink in just a moment. Okay, now that it has done you realize that where our legislators and our President live they have LEGAL RECREATIONAL MARIJUANA.



I am living mostly outside of medical marijuana states, but I will return to a place that allows freedom of choice in medications.

What needs done is for marijuana/ cannabis rescheduled on the Schedule of drugs.


I am not a criminal because I have used marijuana. I am not a bad person because I believe marijuana is not evil.

Who Am I? Political Beliefs Who WIll You Vote For? What Will You Vote For?

Who am I and where do I come from? Those are not just questions I have asked myself. They are often things people ask me. Those questions follow with where do you live?

The truth is I rarely tell anyone where I live because honestly does it matter? And as we travel the country telling people about the benefits of medical marijuana I may live anywhere at anytime. That sounds weird I know, but it is the truth.

My answer is usually Somewhere in the Universe. For me, my home is where my heart is and that remains with my family. So it has been a lot of different places. Missouri, Branson, West Plains, Springfield, California, Colorado, Texas, Oklahoma, Kansas, so on and so on.

Part of the overall reason I rarely tell the world my location is my way of keeping as much turmoil and drama from my life. Being bipolar is an ongoing struggle and remaining as far away from drama helps. There is plenty of chaos in my head without the world throwing in crap. It may seem hard to understand, but it is important to my mental state to remain as calm as possible.

So we live our life as we see fit, we have met people, we have interacted with countless lives as we experience what the world offers. And that has taught me so many valuable things.

When we moved to California, I was still enmeshed in my uninformed beliefs about the evil qualities of weed. Then as if a cloud lifted learned just how ignorant it was to fear a plant. After all, this little plant had been created by a higher power, by God himself. So how could it be so evil?

That was the feelings I held firm. Weed, marijuana, ganja and the million other names describe just a plant.

It was uninformed, ignorant of me to fear and hate something that honestly I simply didn't understand. I had always considered myself a reasonably intelligent individual, but I knew very little in reality about marijuana. All I truly knew was it was smoked, and people got high.

The past media blast of telling the world about the 'evil reefer' had apparently gone deep within my mind. Maybe it was only osmosis that this was my thoughts because my parents felt firm about the evils.

Daddy was adamant about his philosophy regarding 'flower children' or 'blooming idiots' as he called the hippies of the 60s. They both felt that smoking the evil marijuana meant they were worthless, lazy and a lower society.

My parents grew up in a time when people were firm with their patriotic pride. They like all of their generation believed in our leaders even when they didn't agree with the policy.

I remember so many times how angry with jokes made about the President. And when it came to the American flag, Daddy was. Anytime I carried the flag at a horse show or rodeo he gave me the same lecture. If my horse bucked and threw me to the ground, I always was to make sure that the flag stayed off the ground. I was to protect the Red, White, and Blue no matter the consequences.

To this day I still shutter when anyone disrespects the flag or jokes about our President. I am not an Obama fan, but I still believe the office deserves respect. I will gladly admit that the politicians of today make it extremely hard not to laugh at them.

Political opinions on marijuana change for the politicians as the winds of the day change. Sadly, most of our politicians whether they are candidates or elected, their views and statements seem to alter depending on what group they are addressing.

As far as what they are promising, does it matter? It is what they do once elected. Will they stick to their beliefs or will they alter as most have done in the past?

Who Am I? My Journey to Enlightenment After 8 Months Catatonic

Who am I? Well as a kid that grew up in the Ozarks during the 60s during a time of rotary phones and only a few numbers to dial. A time when we had a black and white tv that got if we were lucky two channels, we chased fireflies at night, played outside till the streetlights came on, and build forts on the vacant lot next door. We also explored the entire sewer system under the town with the prodding instruction of my Uncle. But then again that is a different story. The one I will save for later.

But I grew up in this small little town where we didn't lock our doors or cars, and all the neighborhood kids roamed free. Or at least we thought we were free. The actual reality was that the entire town was watching us and protecting us.

I didn't know people told lies, and I thought if it was in the paper or on television it was absolute truth. Now don't get me wrong I was not quite like my Granny, who would sit and argue with the television when her stories were on because in her mind she thought they were real.

As a teenager, I would be lying if I said I had never been around weed smoking and drinking. The reality is that in small towns there isn't a lot of other things for kids to do. That was a terrible thing for me. Because I was around people I loved and cared for and they were smoking marijuana.

It has been particularly hard because my parents taught me that the Reefer Madness propaganda about it being the Devil's Weed was the absolute truth. So my soul was torn between what I was seeing and those teachings. What was right?

Were those I watched smoke it the devil's spawn? Or was there another side to the story? For me, I never saw anything but the evil.

But my life would go in a direction that would take me on a strange epiphany. I suffered an infinite amount of difficulties in a short period. For someone who is Bi-polar, that can be devastating. And for me it was. So as I tried to handle the still fresh wounds of my Mama's death, and fact that my Daddy died not too long after. Those things followed with the house fire that ripped us of nearly everything. And, I had my identity was stolen after that (and the thief had a lot of fun to my name), there were government audits in my company which made me spend every dime of my savings, and the world began to spin.

I went back and forth to my doctor, my psychiatrist, and my cardiologist who sent me deeper into a spiral. The road to treatment led me down the pharmaceutical road of add this to the medications and then add this to that.

The next thing I knew I woke up. It had been eight months, and I didn't remember any of it. I woke to Lynn taking the medications away, and he said things had to stop.

It was so hard, but that was the beginning of a journey that I would have never thought I would take. We moved to California, and I began to meet people treating their medical issues with marijuana.

It was unreal. How could those patients be helped by the one thing I thought was so evil? But I spent time with parents who were treating their autistic children with drops of CBD oil, cancer patients who relied on marijuana so they could eat and take their chemo treatments. Then I got to spend an afternoon with the most remarkable young man. A young man who would change my life.

I first met Mikie, a wonderful boy with the need to be tied to his wheelchair. The straps were the only thing that could contain his shaking body from falling to the ground. He wasn't even able to put two words together to have a conversation. But I was supposed to interview him about his medical treatment.

Sure I had seen what I thought was evidence that marijuana had real medicinal properties but that afternoon my eyes became wide open. This remarkable young man with a beautiful smile sat before me, and I watched as he took two hits off of a joint.

It was the most amazing thing I had ever seen. Mickie's entire body relaxed right before my eyes. There was no denying it, and I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he was not faking it. I watched as that young man relaxed and then we had the most wonderful talk. All because he had taken two hits that relaxed all the muscles and tendons in his body that he struggled with every moment.

Now I was hooked I needed to see more. So I spent time with some of the autistic children and was witness to the effects that two tiny drops of CBD (Cannabinoid oil) had on them. I watched as children that were having hundreds of regular seizures on a weekly basis.  Children that because of those seizures were not able to participate in life at all. They didn't play. They didn't talk, they only suffered. Then I watched as those same children became fabulous little people who ran around playing, laughing and being what God intended in a child.

So as my world and my eyes opened to a possibility of good. The right in what I had always seen as evil I began to see that this natural plant. This plant that doesn't have to be altered to help people. This plant was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.

So who am I? I am a believer. I am an advocate for the use of medical marijuana. And I am a new person who realizes that not everything taught in the past was the truth.